What to Do if You Hate Your Dormmate

Most college or university students will have to stay in a dormitory. If you are lucky enough and can spend a huge amount of money on accommodation, then you can get your own room. But the reality is, it is more practical to share. While meeting new people can be exciting, it’s quite a different case if you will live with a stranger. Apparently, we all have different habits and upbringing. And at times, these could lead to misunderstandings. 

So what do you have to do? How are you going to deal with a dormmate that annoys you? Instead of being passive-aggressive, here are a few things you can try. 

Know the Reasons Why You Hate Your Roommate 

First of all, you have to identify the exact reasons why you dislike your roommate. What are the specific behaviors that tick you off? Remember, you have to be objective and factual. 

Are you not comfortable when your roommate brings friends without your consent? Are you already tired of cleaning your bathroom all the time? Do you think your roomie is inconsiderate by playing loud songs while you are studying? 

Once you have already determined the reasons, it’s time to do the next step.  

Reach Out and Communicate

Some students will just try to be patient and ignore these misbehaviors. But we all deserve to live comfortably even if it’s just a temporary home. The best approach is to reach out to your dormmate and share your sentiments. You have to do it as soon as you can.  

Remember to be assertive when talking to them. Let your roommate know that you are bothered but be diplomatic about it. Do not talk to them while you are angry. Instead, let your emotions die down and find the perfect timing. 

When you are done speaking, you should also listen to your dormmate. Effective communication is not just about speaking your thoughts but also listening to what one has to say. Maybe they have issues with you as well. Do not be defensive and do not take it personally. Instead, acknowledge it and try to improve your habits as necessary. Apologize as well if you have offended them in any way. Bear in mind, no one is perfect. 

Create an Agreement  

This might seem odd for most people, but we highly encourage that you come up with an agreement with your roommate. This will help manage both your expectations and you get to be more organized. When someone breaks the rule, you can easily refer back to that agreement.   

It doesn’t have to be formal, but you have to include things such as the use of common areas, chores, and visiting hours, to name a few. Remember to ask your roommate for suggestions. This agreement should be a win-win for both of you and should not favor one over the other. 

Spend More Time Outdoors 

We understand that some of us enjoy staying at home while we read books or play movies all day long. But if your roommate consistently annoys you, one tactic is to spend more time outside. Your university ground could be a nice place to meet new friends. Perhaps, you can visit a local park and find peace. 

Find Common Ground 

It’s possible to think that you are totally different from your roommate and that there is no chance of forming a better relationship. But you could be wrong.  

We don’t mean that you have to be best friends. But you can at least check if you have something in common. Perhaps you both like to watch movies, or you enjoy working out. Start doing these things together, and you might soon realize that your roommate is not 100% pain in the head. 

Consult with Your Resident Assistant  

If things are already getting out of hand, then it’s time to talk to your resident assistant to act as a mediator. You can share what is happening and be able to seek advice. 

At the end of the day, you have to resolve issues with your roommate as adults. There’s no need to pull pranks, or to throw a fistfight to get your point across. You need to look at different angles and consider that you might have shortcomings as well. However, if it is already taking a toll on your health, or you are literally losing your things because your roommate gets it without your consent, you can always have an option to leave.