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What are the Red Flags for a Bad Social Circle
When you go to college, it is natural to meet different types of people. And while we always encourage that you start building your network, you must choose the right circle. Remember, some cliques might seem fun to be with. However, you have to observe further. Will they influence you to be better, or the other way around?
This post will share with you the signs if a circle is terrible or not. Hopefully, you will use your better judgment and stay away from them as much as you can.
Forces You to Do Things
A great social circle will respect your privacy and personal preference. When your so-called friends urge you to do something you are not interested in or not comfortable with, then that’s a red flag. No one should force you to do anything. And hopefully, you are strong enough to say no to peer-pressure.
Here’s another thing that you have to watch out for. A bad social circle or group uses blackmailing techniques all the time.
Usually, they do emotional blackmailing, and they will remind you of the ‘good’ things they did for you. At times they will make you feel bad about yourself so that you will give in to their requests (whatever it may be). They tend to be manipulative and so you must stay away.
It’s not wrong to be generous. But if your friends seem to take advantage of your generosity, then that’s a different story. More often than not, they will have an excuse to make you pay for anything. A classic one is that they ‘forget’ their wallets. Of course, forgetting a wallet can happen to most of us. But you should know better if this becomes a habit.
Now here’s another angle. We understand that other people might not be financially stable to pitch in for drinks or for whatever snacks you need for small parties. After all, most college students are still working part-time and will have to pay student loans. But this is far more different from people who deliberately use you to get freebies or to enjoy luxuries which they can’t afford in the first place.
We are all guilty about gossiping. For some reason, we always want to hear something controversial and juicy. But if this is something that your friends do all the time, then you might want to reassess if you are in the right circle. Think about it. Why do you have to talk about other people? Do you feel better if you hear someone’s downfall? Wouldn’t it be better to spend your time on more productive things rather than talk about news that isn’t even confirmed?
Disrespects Your Opinion
We are all adults now, and we naturally have a different take on things. Your belief might be different from theirs. But that doesn’t mean you are less of a person, and this doesn’t give them a license to mock or disrespect your opinion. If they always do it, then what’s the point of spending time with them? You would just feel bad, and it does nothing to your well being.
They Don’t Support You
Another sign of a bad circle or group is that they don’t support you in your dreams. For example, you have a business plan that you want to share with them. Even without hearing what you have to say, they will immediately bunk off your thoughts. They will say, “It’s not going to work,” or “It’s too hard”, implying that your skills are not good enough.
You see, it’s always good if people question your ideas. That’s how you are going to improve. However, they should not be the reason for you to stop your plans and to doubt yourself.
They Don’t Let You Become Friends With Others
And lastly, they want to control you by stopping you from being friends with other people. They will make up stories and tell something negative about others so that you will be turned off.
Don’t let them treat you like a property. You can always have different groups and friends. There’s no need to stay in one place, most especially if they do not help you become a better person.
As early as now, you have to keep your distance from a bad social circle. The more that you spend time with them, the more that they will try to manipulate you. Use your time wisely and be with people who possess the same values as yours.
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